


bedside conversations

by Marvelgeek42



Series: Sapphic September 2018 [4]
Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, F/F, Femslash, Middle Ages, Sapphic September 2018, wlw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-08
Updated: 2018-09-08
Packaged: 2019-07-08 15:12:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15933002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marvelgeek42/pseuds/Marvelgeek42
Summary: Aziraphale shot a prayer to above.It would have gone to voicemail, had such a thing existed at that point.





	bedside conversations

“Have you heard about what they are doing — or rather  _ not  _ doing —  in Europe now, Azira?” Crowley asked her opposite one morning in the bedroom. (1)

“No.”

Both of them looked at each other.

“Will you tell me?” Aziraphale requested.

“You’re always telling me to be polite and the one time I wait for you to ask, you get annoyed,” Crowley responded in mock-annoyance.

“So what are they  _ not _ doing?”

“Bathing.”

Aziraphale shot a prayer to above.

It would have gone to voicemail, had such a thing existed at that point.

“ _ Why _ would they do this?” she wondered.

Crowley shrugged. “Supposedly it keeps my people away.”

“...does it?” Aziraphale asked, an eyebrow raised.

“Technically, I suppose.”

“How so?”

“Look, I might be evil but even I have standards. And their smell is so far below them, that Hell probably should hire whoever came up with it. They’d to pretty good… er, I mean bad, of course. Yes, bad. They’d do pretty bad work.”

“I suppose you are correct. I suppose now I should go an thwart this evil plan of yours.”

“It’s not like Hell is gonna listen anyways,” Crowley replied, shaking her head dismissively. “How about another round?”   


* * *

 

(1) It had been a rather genius idea, Crowley supposed, to argue that since everyone agreed only a man and a woman could have sex, the two of them both inhibiting female bodies meant they were  _ not  _ ‘enjoying the sins of the flesh’. It had been almost  _ too  _ easy.


End file.
